Category: Blog Posts

There is a lot we don’t know about autism, but every study is bringing us closer to understanding its cause and the why it affects people so differently. In an effort to keep you up-to-date, here are some recent findings that you may not have heard of yet:1. Scientific American reports that “autism and schizophrenia may be independent outcomes of the same genetic syndrome.”

Both conditions are associated with the deletion of a stretch of DNA on chromosome 22. Carrie Bearden, professor of psychiatry, biobehavioral sciences and psychology at the University of California, Los Angeles found, “Up to 30 percent of individuals missing this region, called 22q11.2, develop a psychotic disorder (schizophrenia). Up to 50 percent are diagnosed with autism.” (Does that mean someone with autism will develop schizophrenia later in life? Not at all.) What researches are now concentrating on is finding the biological causes of the features of these two conditions and discovering why they trigger the behaviors they do.

2. Generally, the earliest parents notice the first signs of autism is age 1, however MRI scans can see it in the brain much earlier than that.

According to Heather Hazlett, a psychologist at the University of North Carolina’s Carolina Institute for Developmental Disabilities (CIDD), enlargement of the brain seems to correlate with the arrival of autistic symptoms.

3. 50% of those with autism also have alexithymia, a condition defined by a difficulty understanding and identifying one’s own emotions.

Recognizing emotion depends in part on reading peoples’ faces. Those with autism often avoid looking into other people’s eyes, which contributes to their difficulty detecting emotions. Interestingly, if they don’t have alexithymia, they scan the eyes and mouth in a pattern similar to those without autism.
By contrast, people with alexithymia (with our without autism) look at faces for a typical amount of time, but scan the eyes and mouth in altered patterns.

Ongoing research is vital. The more we understand autism, the better our treatments will be. If you’d like to learn more, I provide online education specifically for how families with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) can apply neuroscience and psychology to improve their relationships. And if you have specific issues you need help with, you might qualify for online therapy as well. Contact my office and schedule a session.

• Strengthen the immune system and detoxify the body

• Reduce stress and blood pressure

• Strengthen abdominal and intestinal muscles

• Aid in healthy sleep patterns

Sit up straight and place your hands on your belly, just above your belly button. Let your fingertips touch lightly. Exhale fully through your mouth. Breath in deeply through your nose and into your belly, so your fingertips start to spread apart. Hold your breath for two to five seconds. Exhale slowly through your mouth. Match the length of the inhale with the length of the exhale. Continue breathing in this manner for five to ten minutes.

Summertime is the time for vacations, fun in the sun, and getting away from it all to relax. You should definitely make time for it this year. I know I’m really looking forward to my time off in August!But I do remember the crazy-making times I spent getting my family ready for vacation, when the kids were young. It’s a real struggle getting our Aspies (loved ones with Asperger’s) out the door.

They obsess about packing and where you’re going to stay. Yet once you’re seated on the plane and your Aspie can sleep or read, they begin to participate and maybe even enjoy the vacation. (To help you prepare for your trip, you can read some stress free travel tips here.)

Our Aspies seem to have fun on vacation. And what’s really surprising is that your communications go well – better than they have in years. You actually start believing in your relationship again. You begin to let your guard down…

And then wham! Reality hits you in the face. As soon as you get home, the stress and confusion begins all over again, maybe even worse than it was before. What’s up?

Vacations do take us away from the demands of ordinary life and that’s why they’re relaxing. But for the Aspie the return to the “real world” is even more stressful than before they left.

You’re not alone in experiencing this. In my practice, I’m often asked: “Why do we communicate well on vacation but not otherwise?” It makes sense if you think about it. You’re not being distracted by day-to-day demands.

Do you have some good ideas for easing back after vacations? Or perhaps you’ve figured out how to get out the door without all of the fighting. Please share your strategies with our Asperger Syndrome: Partners & Family of Adults with ASD meetup. Join the free teleconference on Thursday, July 20th at 3:00 PM PST. It’s entitled: “Why do we communicate well on Vacation but not otherwise?” It will help you enjoy your re-entry into life after vacation.

If you’re seeking specific information on ASD, please consider my online education or online therapy. It’s convenient and cost effective.

Do you think an 18 year old is an adult? It’s commonly accepted that by the age of 18, a young man or a woman is an adult with adult privileges and adult consequences. For example, if you commit a crime at the age of 18 you’ll be tried as an adult in the court of law.Yet, neuroscience shows that the brain is not fully developed by then. The process for making new connections and pruning unnecessary neurons continues well into the early twenties. Surprisingly, there’s an explosion of connectivity occurring after the age of 18. No wonder these young adults often make unwise decisions!

Earlier I wrote about Laurence Steinberg, a psychologist at Temple University, who found that “cognitive skills usually form by age 16 while psychosocial maturity — measured by impulsivity, risk perception, thrill-seeking, resistance to peer influence — doesn’t begin until age 18, steadily increasing through the early 20s.”

A recent New York Times article considers the impact this is having on the criminal court system and what alternatives we might have. According to the article, “Young adults 18 to 24 make up 10 percent of the population, but they account for 28 percent of all arrests (2.1 million in 2015), a rate higher than that of any other age group.”

The article also reports on a new experiment based on neuroscience. A number of cities are now hosting Young Adult Courts – a hybrid of adult/juvenile justice systems. (San Francisco was the first. Now there are more across the U.S. as well as in England and Wales.)

The court staff is trained in neuroscience by a clinical psychologist, so they can apply this science to offenders between the ages of 18-24. They follow up by providing these immature “adults” with supervision, education, and support as they weekly check in and report their progress.

Rather than having a permanent black mark on their record, which can adversely change their entire future prospects, these young adults are getting help to mature and develop better decision-making skills. This a definite WIN!

Understanding how the brain works is fundamental to solving many of the issues young ones face today. I’m fascinated especially by how empathy is formed in some individuals while it isn’t formed in others. I’ll let you in on a secret…I’m in the process of writing my next book on the topic of empathy. I’m anxious to share with you what I’ve learned.

Did you know I provide online education specifically for how entrepreneurial couples and families with ASD can apply neuroscience and psychology to improve their relationships? And if you have personal issues you need help with, you might qualify for online therapy as well. In our busy, hectic lives, the Internet can make counseling easier and more accessible. Why not see if it’s right for you?

If you could ask me anything about Aspergers and your AS/NT relationship, what would you ask?Coming up in July you’ll have three opportunities to actually do just that. Each one of my low cost video conferences will be dedicated to answering your nagging questions. Because that’s what it’s like living with Aspies, isn’t it? There are these confusing moments, loose connections and vague gut feelings.

What might some of your questions be about?

• How do I parent my Aspie children with an Aspie partner?
• How can I help my NT child deal with his/her Aspie parent?
• How can I find a measure of romance in my AS/NT relationship?
• What are some ways to keep my sanity in a trying situation?
• What specific rules of engagement will help my Aspie and I connect?
• How can I help my Aspie to at least acknowledge my feelings?
• How can I feel whole despite the craziness and loneliness?

Do any of these questions strike a chord with you? Perhaps they at least get you thinking about a topic that’s important to you. Please write your ideas down, so you don’t forget between now and the conference.

Let’s gather to share our collective wisdom. I don’t have all of the answers, but beneath the surface of our perplexing lives is a pattern. I believe this pattern is discoverable. These low cost conferences will be held on Thursday, July 6th at 9AM, Wednesday, July 12th at 2PM, and Thursday, July 27th at 4PM. The spots are filling up quickly, so, if you’re a member of our Asperger Syndrome: Partners & Family of Adults with ASD Meetup be sure to register very soon. (Not a member yet? If you are the neuro typical partner in a NT/AS relationship, request an invitation.)

If you prefer to consult with me one-on-one and you live near Portland, OR/Vancouver, WA please contact my office and schedule an appointment. Otherwise, you might qualify for either online therapy or online education. Check out the services I provide and choose the one that’s the right fit for you.

When you discover that your child has Asperger’s Syndrome, it makes you feel utterly helpless. I know, because I’m a trained psychologist, with a master’s degree in social work and a doctoral degree in psychology and I still felt that way about my own daughter who, by the age of 14, was officially diagnosed with ASD.Recently I wrote an article for PsychCentral about my experience, hoping that it would let others know they’re not alone. (You can read the full article here.) One aspect that I wish I’d done differently is that I became a classic helicopter mother.

I found all kinds of ways to work around the school system. I hired tutors to coach her. I negotiated high school credit from outside activities. I tried Brownies, soccer, piano lessons, and summer camps. I forced her to audition for a prestigious private choir because of her marvelous singing ability—even though she was frightened of the other choir members. I tried everything I could think of to make my autistic child smile.

Being a helicopter parent is a natural outcome of the crazy-making AS/NT world. Our natural instincts are to protectively hover over our children when they have such a serious disability.

However, there are serious drawbacks to helicopter parenting. It leaves you very little time to relax and enjoy your children. As the super-responsible parent, you circle your child with help while not leaving enough time for hugs and play.

Lessons I learned from my ASD daughter:

Helicopter parenting is a natural by-product of loving your very dependent child. Don’t let anyone tell you that you are over-reacting. Your strongest asset is your heart.

• Channel your helicoptering into finding a good psychologist or Asperger Syndrome specialist.
• Join a support group like Asperger Syndrome: Partners & Family of Adults with ASD.
• Read everything you can about Asperger Syndrome.
• Join your local Autism Society affiliate. It’s important that you socialize with other parents and spouses who share your experience.
• Don’t blame yourself for your mistakes. Love yourself enough to keep on creating a meaningful life in spite of them.
• Take time to relax and play.

Yes, there have been tremendous improvements in understanding Asperger’s Syndrome. But we have a long way to go to help our AS/NT families. I’ve made it my mission to be a source of knowledge and support. If you live near Portland, OR/Vancouver, WA please contact my office and schedule an in-person appointment. If you live elsewhere and are seeking information on ASD, please take advantage of my online education.