Category: Blog Posts

Most people would like to rise above their life and work challenges and make a real difference in the world around them. It’s important to all of us that what we do matters, even if we do lead seemingly average lives.

Sometimes, it can be something small that matters the most. Take the story of Leon Ricks, an 85-year-old man who recently died in California. He had Asperger’s Syndrome, and even though he had trouble interacting with others socially, he was beloved by his neighbors. Plus he made a real contribution to his community, although it wasn’t recognized until he was gone.

Mr. Ricks spent his life walking the streets of his town, Altadena, taking photographs of everything. When his family was sorting through the boxes of photos, they discovered that his lifetime of photography documented the history of the town. So much so that the president of the Altadena Historical Society said his photo collection was “every historian’s dream.”

What struck me as I read this article was that we all contribute to our communities in one way or another. And if we take time to be grateful for what others do and even what we can do ourselves, it’s another way of contributing to society. Especially when we make a habit of expressing our appreciation, it becomes a really valuable contribution. How nice it would have been for Mr. Ricks if he could have enjoyed the appreciation from his town.

Sometimes, though, our thoughts and emotions get out of balance and we don’t see things or even the people in our lives in such a positive light. Then it’s a good time to seek professional guidance. If you live in the Portland, Oregon or Vancouver, Washington area, and would like to talk about it, contact my office and set up an appointment.

Unusually large vocabularies for their age. This may lead to boredom at school and with their peers.

Ability to read earlier than most children, often before entering school. Being ahead of the others can lead to boredom, lack of motivation, cynicism and depression.

Greater comprehension of the subtleties of language. They may use words to manipulate others.

Longer attention span, persistence and intense concentration. They become so focused that other duties are forgotten or they stubbornly resist being interrupted.

Tendency to put ideas of thing together in ways that are unusual and not obvious (divergent thinking). They may be very creative and not fit in with peers.

Ability to retain a great deal of information. They may be very sensitive and worry about issues of fair play, equality or truth, and they desire logic rather than tradition or feelings. They may be perfectionists or intolerant of others.

Unusual sense of humor. They may become the class clown to gain attention.

In today’s world, very few women want to be stay-at-home moms. Most women prefer to have a career. However, statistics show that many are working much more than they’d really like. A recent New York Times/CBS News poll showed that only a quarter of mothers with school age children want to be working full-time if money were no object.

There’s a lot of confusing data and misinformation out there, such as the oft repeated, but unsubstantiated, statistic that 80 percent of parents of autistic children will divorce. Granted, raising an autistic child does add more stress, especially since parents must suddenly become experts in education, health care, early intervention, insurance policies and so much more amidst the storm of emotions connected with learning of your child’s diagnosis. But that in no way means your marriage is doomed. 

Parents are encouraged to draw boundaries to preserve the quality of life with each other, with their neuro-typical children, family, friends and careers. You can’t let the guilt and grief of autism consume you. It’s important to discuss a division of labor between you and your life partner so you make decisions together and express appreciation for what each is doing. It’s damaging to spring emotionally charged decisions on a mate who is already stressed out.

To keep your brain’s skills sharp, discover some free and some paid smart phone apps that are fun to use plus provide brain exercise as mentioned in The New York Times’ article, A Workout for Your Brain, on Your Smartphone.

If we remain aware of this potential and continually keep improving our brain skills, then it’s great to utilize the tech tools available. In fact, I have been recommending three smart phone apps, Live OCD Free, iCouch CBT, and Moodkit – Mood Improvement Tool. These have proved to be invaluable to many as they cope with daily living.

Sometimes however, you need to talk to someone face to face. If you are experiencing difficulty in coping with life and would like to enlist the help of a therapist, please contact my office and set up an appointment in my office in Portland, Oregon or Vancouver, Washington..