Rising Above Betrayal, Gossip, and Loss to Find Your True Purpose

In this blog, we will talk about what happens when the truth doesn’t set you free—when gossip spreads, when you lose the people you love, and when the only way forward is to let go.

It’s unfortunate, but there is something many of us have faced: gossip that takes on a life of its own. Rumors don’t just fade—they spread, they grow, and sometimes, no matter how much truth you present, people believe what they want to believe. But here’s the real question: Does that mean you stop living your life? Or do you rise above it?

The Nature of Gossip

Years ago, I had a client who was trapped in an abusive marriage. She finally got the courage to seek out an attorney. But when she met with him, she was blindsided. He told her, ‘Oh no, you’re seeing her? She’s bat-shit crazy.’

That lawyer was Mike Roe—a former law partner of my ex-husband Howard. And he had been feeding off the same gossip Howard spread about me for years. This woman sat across from him, looking for help, looking for someone to fight for her, and instead, she was met with a wall of bias, built from rumors that had nothing to do with her.

Why does this matter?

• Gossip isn’t just words—it’s a tool. A way for people to control a narrative. A way to keep you in a box of their choosing.
• Some people thrive on gossip because it makes them feel powerful. It creates a social order where they get to decide who is ‘good’ and who is ‘bad.’
• And when you challenge that order, when you break free from their expectations, they don’t just let you go—they try to pull you back down.

Questions for Reflection

• How many times have people judged you based on what they’ve heard, rather than who you actually are?
• How many times have you fought to prove yourself to people who have already made up their minds?

The truth is—when gossip is set in motion, it’s nearly impossible to stop. So what do you do? You stop trying to prove yourself to people who refuse to see you.

The Cost of Gossip & the Decision to Rise Above

Howard didn’t just gossip about me to friends or lawyers—he took it into the courtroom. He told the judge I was just trying to get more money. He denied that our daughters had special needs. I cried in that courtroom, fighting for them. I had to bring in doctors, specialists, educators—all to prove what I had known all along.

The judge was stunned. But it didn’t matter. The damage was done. Howard kept up the smear campaign, and my daughters—my own daughters—turned away from me.

That’s the price of gossip. It doesn’t just hurt your reputation. It can take away the people you love most.

But if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: If you need people to see the truth in order to feel free, you will never be free.

Why gossip can be dangerous

• Gossip can cost you friendships, jobs, even relationships with your own family.
• But the real danger isn’t just what people say about you—it’s what you let it do to you.
• If you spend your life trying to erase lies, you’ll never have time to build the truth.

The Decision to Move Forward

Maybe you’ve been lied about. Maybe you’ve been smeared, abandoned, or betrayed. And maybe—just maybe—you’re still waiting for people to come around, to finally see you for who you are. But what if that never happens? Can you still live a full life? Can you still rise? The answer is yes. But only if you stop chasing the truth and start building your own path forward.

At some point, you have to decide: Do you keep fighting to be understood, or do you start living the life you were meant to live? You can’t control what others say, but you can control how much of your energy you give to it. The moment you stop needing people to see the truth, you take your power back.