Author: Kathy Marshack

Tips for Children

When you have an Autistic or Asperger’s child, the idea of traveling can feel like a daunting task. One of the main symptoms of autism is the need for a routine, and traveling can throw routine right out the window. But it is not always possible to stay confined at home. So, is traveling possible or even advisable with an autistic child?

Absolutely! I was inspired by Gina Degiudice-Asch, a mother with a 16 year old autistic son. The New York Times posted a video interview (produced by Miki Meek) with Gina discussing how she overcomes the challenges of traveling with her autistic son Andrew. She shares excellent travel tips that have worked for their family trips – such as planning in advance and adjusting how they travel. What I also found interesting was that traveling has helped Andrew grow and blossom as a young person. He has become more adaptable and now at 16, traveling has become much easier.

Tips for Adults

Traveling with an Autistic or Asperger adult can be just as daunting as traveling with an Autistic child. The need for structure and the usual routines is just as prominent for adults on the Spectrum as for children. How about the AS adult who has to count every bag multiple times and worries himself sick that the bags will get lost in transit? Or the frantic AS adult whose stress mounts with each passenger that boards ahead of him on the plane . . . worrying that there will be no more space in the overhead bin? The last thing you need is a full blown meltdown at the airport with security so tight these days.

One woman discovered this cure. Wherever she goes with her AS husband the couple has decided that they can take no more than one bag . . . and it must be a carry on. Secondly, at the gate, she notifies the airline gate attendant that her spouse has an Autism Spectrum Disorder and that he requires priority seating because of his extreme anxiety. If further explanation is necessary, she explains what an adult meltdown will look like. No problem, they are seated even before the first class passengers, so her husband can find the perfect spot to store his bag.

Planning in advance and making necessary adjustments are critical when traveling with an autistic family member. Take a few extra steps before you leave and you’ll ensure a more relaxing trip for everyone!

When you are in a relationship with someone with Asperger Syndrome, you will experience ups and downs. This is not to say that the Aspie partner is to blame or is at “fault.” However, given that the core characteristics of Asperger Syndrome relate to communication, emotions, perspective taking and sensory issues, the very components upon which relationships are built, it is no wonder that misunderstanding and frustration often crop up in these relationships.

I was recently quoted in an article by Pam Mellskog of Longmont Time Calls Newspaper for an article on adult Asperger relationships. In the article she highlights the relationship of Miles and Eugenia. Miles has Asperger Syndrome. The couple discusses their issues with communication and the added influence of Asperger Syndrome in their relationship.

Mellskog recommends my book, Life with a Partner or Spouse with Asperger Syndrome: Going Over the Edge, as a book specifically designed to address communication issues in adult Asperger relationships. The book is unique in how it addresses the often “touchy” topics of sex, rage, divorce and shame. I share poignant anecdotes from individuals I’ve worked with over the years who have been in NT-Aspie relationships, including myself, giving a glimpse at the “inner workings” of these relationships. I’m glad to see that this important topic is getting more attention. To read the article in its entirety, visit TimesCalls.com – Love can prevail.

This month is National Adoption Month. Since I have adopted two children, I love to see the extra emphasis placed on raising awareness about adoption and foster care. The chosen theme is “Answering the Call – You don’t have to be perfect to be a perfect parent.” What a great theme! For more information, visit the Child Welfare Information Gateway website.

With my personal experience, I have recognized that raising adopted children and growing up adopted is different than it is for other families. There are many similarities, but the exceptions to the rule need to be examined too. It is foolish for adoptive parents to raise their children without education about the effects of adoption on the lives of their children and themselves. So in addition to the regular books and seminars on effective parenting, adoptive families should be reading and talking to adoption professionals about the special needs of their families.

Raising a child is no easy task, but with the right attitude and right education, it is a wonderful and life changing experience. If you would like more information on adoptive families, please contact my office.

Yes, the holidays are literally around the corner. Usually this time of year is full of excitement and anticipation, but with the recent economic downturn the holidays are turning into a time of stress and anxiety. I have found that people are slightly fearful of how they are going to cope with this time of year especially after experiencing a layoff or some other financial hit.

Here are a few things I recommend that will help you avoid stressing out this holiday season:

1. Accept that you may be stressed, but focus on what you can do and not on what you can’t. You may have to make adjustments in how you choose the celebrate the holidays, but don’t lose sight of the joys that you can still have with the right attitude.

2. Exercise, exercise, exercise. It is a proven stress buster and mood enhancer. Find what type of exercise that you enjoy most and make time for it.

3. Take time to meditate. There is an obvious connection between the mind and body and with the help of meditation, you can reduce stress, headaches and hypertension.

4. Spend time with the ones you love. Don’t underestimate the power of love and friendship. A good time with friends and family is sure to enhance your mood.

I was interviewed about this very subject on KGW Portland News Channel 8. You can view the entire segment and see how myself and others have decided to view the upcoming holiday season –
http://www.kgw.com/thesquare/Happy-Holidays-What-already-69994867.html.
Make it a happy holiday. You have the power to do so!

Living life with autism can be extremely frustrating. Experts are finding that anxiety is on the rise for children and teens with autism spectrum disorders, roughly 80% according to recent statistics. A University of South Florida clinic has been researching treatment options for young ones with autism and anxiety. According to their research, the most effective treatment they have found so far is cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy addresses the way people think. The techniques are designed to change faulty irrationally thinking into more constructive, solution-oriented thinking. Through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy you are confronted with the irrational beliefs and offered a new way of thinking about them.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has been used successfully with a variety of human problems from depression to low self-esteem to relationship dysfunction to phobias and anxiety, to writer’s block. However, as with all therapies, it is not the best solution for all people and this type of research is still new and under development. It is encouraging to see the medical community taking a more active interest in looking for ways to help young ones with autism cope with their anxiety.

Visit my website for more information on Psychotherapy Treatment Options including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.